I am writing this down because I do not want to forget where this started.
I started running on 14 May 2026.
Not because I suddenly became a fitness person. Not because I had everything figured out. I started because something in me knew I could not keep living the same way and expect to feel different.
I started at 94.5kg. I started with a 20-minute pace.
That first run was very tiring. My breathing was all over the place. My legs were hurting. My body felt heavy in a way I could not ignore anymore.
And honestly, I felt embarrassed.
Embarrassed about the fat I had. Embarrassed that running felt this hard. Embarrassed that I let myself reach a point where even moving my own body felt like a fight.
But maybe that embarrassment was also the truth I needed. Not to hate myself. Not to punish myself. Just to finally be honest.
This journey is not only about building my body. It is also about healing my mind.
Every time I run, every time I train, every time I choose discipline over comfort, I am not just exercising. I am fighting for the person I want to become.
Right now, the hardest part is pace.
I can show up. I can try. I can sweat. But learning to run faster, learning to control my breathing, learning to stop fighting my own body with every step, that is the hard part.
Still, I want this.
By the end of this year, my goal is clear:
To reach 75-80kg. To improve my running pace to pace 5. To complete my first half marathon.
The half marathon matters because I want proof.
Proof that the person once called the fat kid can run that distance. Proof that I can become the first in my bloodline to do it. Proof that the story does not have to end where it started.
There will be days where I feel tired. There will be days where I feel like giving up. There will be days where progress feels slow.
But I need to remember this:
I did not start because it was easy. I started because I needed to change. I started because I deserve to feel stronger, healthier, lighter, and more at peace with myself.
More than the numbers, I want to become someone who does not quit on himself.
When I read this at the end of the year, I want to know that I showed up. Even on the hard days. Even when nobody was watching. Even when I was tired, stressed, or mentally drained.
This is my promise:
I will keep going. I will build my body. I will protect my mind. I will become stronger than the version of me who started.
One run at a time. One rep at a time. One day at a time.
By the end of this year, I will not just look different.
I will be different.
The numbers will keep moving on my live running dashboard. This page is here for the part the dashboard cannot measure: the promise, the hard days, the embarrassment, the comeback, and the proof that I kept showing up.
